1 TIMOTHY 5:9-16 INVESTING IN OTHERS
9 No widow may be put on the list of widows unless she is over sixty, has been faithful to her husband, 10 and is well known for her good deeds, such as bringing up children, showing hospitality, washing the feet of the saints, helping those in trouble and devoting herself to all kinds of good deeds.
11 As for younger widows, do not put them on such a list. For when their sensual desires overcome their dedication to Christ, they want to marry. 12 Thus they bring judgment on themselves, because they have broken their first pledge. 13 Besides, they get into the habit of being idle and going about from house to house. And not only do they become idlers, but also gossips and busybodies, saying things they ought not to. 14 So I counsel younger widows to marry, to have children, to manage their homes and to give the enemy no opportunity for slander. 15 Some have in fact already turned away to follow Satan.
16 If any woman who is a believer has widows in her family, she should help them and not let the church be burdened with them, so that the church can help those widows who are really in need.
The typical manner in which we deal with those in need in our society and even in the church is far from what St. Paul describes to Timothy in this passage. For the most part we do not get individually involved with the recipients of our aid. All they need to do is provide us with an immediate stimulus for giving, whether a dramatic story, our own guilt or even our impatience, and we will “help” them out. There are three outcomes to this scenario. First, we might actually be meeting a real need. Second, we are being taken advantage of. And third, we are fueling the person’s addiction, slothfulness or even criminal behavior. The odds here for a godly outcome are not good, both from a stewardship and a ministry perspective. We are to give out of love for the other and not our need to give. In this life, love is a messy and time consuming affair involving getting to know the other person.
In his instruction to Timothy about widows, St. Paul is focusing us on the relational aspect of Christian care and support. Notice the detail in the list of qualifications of the widow. These all are based on the life lived by the widow. In addition, the prohibitions are predicated on what is best for the widow – avoiding those things that could lead her into a spiritually dangerous place. Finally, there is the concern for the best use of limited resources by the church. To use a first-come-first-served approach to distributing aid may well prevent the church from providing for a genuine need.
Will there be times when it is appropriate to give aid without having a personal relationship? Certainly, there will always be personal and community disasters, but such giving should be extraordinary. We have a God who became human and lived among us in order to give us the opportunity to accept eternal aid. If we are to be like him, we need to make the investment in people in need rather than the concept of charity.
You, O Lord, came down from heaven and became human in order to provide for my greatest need; a need that on my own I could not even know I have. Help me to base my meeting the needs of others on the model of your relationship with me. May you ever advise me in my investing in others. Amen.